Please send me ALL the manly Macho-ness you can....

[Laurel]

*whimpers* I'm such a girl! (but would I want to thought of as otherwise?) eh, I'm rambling....

...so here's the story....I went about cleaning the kitchen this morning and bent down to get a dishwasher tablet from beneathe the sink, when something black in the sink caught my eye. I jumped back and stopped breathing. (bearing in mind this incident is happening almost a week after plugging in the spider repellent thingy...) I crept a little closer and peeped over the edge and sure enough, sat right between the washing up bowl and the side of the sink...was a dirty big spider!!! NOOOOOOO!!!! It looks dead....all crouched up and actually looks like its begun to mould...??? (it's fluffy)

Ross told me via phone to boil the kettle and flush it down the drain......but GUESS WHAT....there's no water in the kettle!!! The kettle is TOO BIG for any other sink in the house.....I'm not going ANYWHERE near that spider infested sink.....so....ahem....

PLEASE send me all your "I'm a manly macho spider killing machine" vibes to me....because I feel positively sick and this spider is SO BIG that I'd happily let it live....but I can't touch it!!

...mabe I should call the RSPCA???

Please help me.

[Jamo]

Go to the garage, get the S2 or Golf and drive over the sink, alternatively use biological weapons and put a used nappie in the sink

[Laurel]

Not helpful....but absolutely hilarious!

ugh, can spiders crawl up stainless steel? I was under the impression they can't in general...but there's always those super spiders that can just about do anything...maybe I should let the pet lizard loose on it?? But then I'll have crickets hopping all over me... lose:lose

[PistonBroke]

Option 1
Does it actually need boiling water to flush it down the sink - surely it's not one of those armour plated cold water resistant spiders very rarely seen on these shores!
If it is, would the kettle fit in the toilet - you could probably fill it with a few flushes.

Option2
Break out the Dyson - it's dead innit ( the spider that is - not the Dyson )

Option 3
Have you got a leaf blower in the garage, you could probably blow it all the way out the back door with one of those things.

[Fat Audi 80]

Grab a hand full of kitchen roll and with a big scream of "I hate you, you furry bas t ard" squash it will all the strength you can muster.

This is the first step to removing your fear of spinders.

My wife can now "kill" most insects this way.

Or I roll up, and pick it up and throw it outside.

[sheppardnias]

Couple of options here.....

1) Fill the kettle from the bath or shower (take off the shower head). Dull option and I'd give it a miss....


2) Pour petrol or lighter fluid in the sink and burn it away. Great fun but might involve the cost of a new kitchen.

3) (This is my fav...) Use a can of hairspray and a lighter to make a personal flame thrower and cremate it is a controlled fashion whilst screaming abuse and shaking....

Finally.... You could play the girly card and stand by the street sobbing until someone takes pity and asks if they can offer you some assistance..... Tends not to work for us chaps. Especially the larger ones of us out there.....

[Jamo]

Call in the professionals

[volcano rs]

get a life

[Sonic]

Ross told me via phone...

Thats your problem right there. Get Ross to come home the lazy bar stuard!

[bluequattro]

nail gun if you ve a good aim, or sledge hammer if not

[Jamo]

nail gun if you ve a good aim, or sledge hammer if not

DaisFunky you need a proper man's man tool BFG

[avants2turbo]

fill a kettle in the toilet... Are u kidding? I use the kettle to make things that i consume... Ross must have some long nose pliers in the garage, put some gardening gloves on and pick it up with the pliers and feed it to the lizard, job done

[Laurel]

Thanks all, some very imaginative ideas here!!

The spider died.

It was alive at first, but I didn't know that, so I poured some water into the basin and the spider went absolutely mental...it actually swam to the washing up bowl and clung on for dear life. So I turned the tap off and the water drained away....then the spider began to scuttle about like crazy and I dropped a spoon in to squish it...but I missed....so it hid beneathe it instead....then Ryan needed "boob" and a change, so 30mins later, I went back into the kitchen and peeped into the sink...the spider was suspiciously scrunched up - it was like it faught like mad to stay alive and then lost the will to live. So I took the washing up bowl out of the sink and then poured more water into the sink and the spider drained into the plug hole...erm and got stuck!!! Ewww there's a big black spider's leg draped out of the plughole...waiting for Ross to come home and get rid of it!

Job Done!!!

Thanks all!

[A80Avant]

spider legs...hmmm yummy! i suggest you cut them of and get them fried for Ross! nice dinner!

[Laurel]

AAARGH! This is ridiculous!! Just seen this guy scuttling across the living room today. Had to grab Ryan off the floor and take a picture (to provide proof to those poxy spider plug people...) before I could do anything...


..now it's gone. Ew ew ew ewwwwww!!