Oh Dear, Dear Me

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  • Azman
    S2Forum Possessed
    • Sep 2005
    • 3205
    • Country: United Kingdom

    #1

    Oh Dear, Dear Me

    Hi guys,

    Nursing a bit of a sore pride this morning but I have got a question that really does need answering.

    First a little story.

    I left home last night at ten to go to work in Peterborough. Picked up two mates for the 60ml trek and of we popped down the A47. Everything was cool having a laugh then we got to the borough. At this point I must say I was not in my coupe but in my wifes PT Cruiser (better on fuel for the journey), anyway we hit the perimeter road and cruised just like the name at just (read into what you like) above the limit as there are cameras.

    Here's the painfull bit. We spot a dear in the fast lane (where I am) and there is no other traffic on the road, he looks up at me, I slam on the anchors and move to the hard shoulder as quick as poss.

    Here's the killer (no pun intended). Just and I mean just about to pass the little ( he was the size of a great dane (thinner legs though and I know dogs don't have horns) s**t when he decides to chew a great big hole in my front bumper. Now with dear firmly planted where he shouldnt be and parts of the bumper splattering the windscreen, the girls blouse sitting next to me screaming down my lug hole and a bridge support coming towards me I stopped.

    Now the question is why? I was at least 2-3 cars width away from the thing. Why decide to suddenly have a quick look at it's reflection. Why choose my bumper. Why not the 18wheeler behind me? Why did it make such a big hole? How was the bas***d still alive? Why didn't I reverse and get revenge for the hole? Why did I ring the stealers this morning to find out how much the parts are going to cost? Why next time Bambi fancies crossing my path do I feel obliged not to turn the wheel the other way?

    Anyone else had this sort of experience? Perhaps we should club together and contact Mr Attenborough to see if he can shed a light on a dear's need to park itself in the bumper of 1.6tons of car moving a damn sight quicker than it ever will?

    Ho hum. Glad that of my chest. No pics sorry. But I don't think the police who turned up would have appreciated it.

    Cheers for listening.

    Aaron
    Dark Grey Avant
    RS2 FARB
    Powerflex Front wishbone bushes
    Alloy Subframe Bushes
  • rotoryboy
    S2Forum Possessed
    • May 2004
    • 3281
    • Country: United Kingdom

    #2
    the girls blouse sitting next to me screaming down my lug hole
    lmao, well at least you wern't in the Audi
    Mark

    Race Clio RS197

    S2 Coupe ABY (Green) - RIP
    S2 Coupe ABY (Blue) - Sold

    Comment

    • dan_b
      S2Forum Possessed
      • Sep 2003
      • 3670
      • Home: United Kingdom Current: England

      #3
      Oops - just thank the maker that you weren't in the S2 at the time?

      I don't think there's any real explanation for why some of the less intelligent prey animals seemingly run toward their doom when they're being stalked by fearsome hunters, but perhaps it's some sort of evolution in action, survival of the fittest? If the animal is so dumb as to actually throw itself in front of a car/ fearsome hunter, then it's clearly too stupid to deserve to survive and pass on its DNA, therefore improving the fitness of the species?
      Ex S2 owner, now running around in an A4 Avant quattro...

      Comment

      • Fat Audi 80
        Super Moderator
        • Jan 2004
        • 10547
        • Country: England

        #4
        They don't know what cars are and just want to play....

        Unlucky, but on the other hand, It COULD have been the S2 and it was only a Chrysler...

        Cheers,

        Steve
        The Perfectionist
        sigpic
        Audi Class Concours winner Stoner Park 2014, ADI Concours D'Elegance Class Winner 2008, Runner up 2014. Winner, S2Forum Show'n'Shine Billing 2006 & 2008.

        Comment

        • S2central.net
          Retired OG Mod
          • Jul 2003
          • 16590
          • Country: Northern Ireland

          #5
          Worse things happen at sea !
          Paul Nugent
          Webmaster http://S2central.net
          Administrator http://S2forum.com

          1994 S2 Coupe ABY - aka Project Lazarus
          2001 A6 allroad 2.5TDi - family tank
          2003 S4 Avant 4.2 V8 - daily burble

          Purveyor of HomeFries and Exclusive agent for Samco hose kits (S2/RS2)

          There are only 10 kinds of people that understand binary - those that do, and those that don't

          Comment

          • Jas11n
            S2Forum Zealot
            • Jan 2004
            • 5067
            • Country: England

            #6
            Try getting hit in the chest by a pheasant at 40 mph on a motorbike, and then put up with getting the mik taken out of you at work for the next month due to not being able to move cos of the pain of 5 broken ribs
            Not to mention the paramedic taking the mik out of the feathers stuck in my lid.
            Pheasant didn't survive

            I echo what the lads say, least it wasn't the cq20v at the time, and you're lucky it didn't come through the screen that would have been nasty.
            Last edited by Jas11n; 16 November 2005, 00:04.
            2001 Avus Silver B5 RS4.
            2004 A4 Avant 1.8T quattro Sport-LE.
            1995 S2 Coupe - sold (sniff)

            Comment

            • rotoryboy
              S2Forum Possessed
              • May 2004
              • 3281
              • Country: United Kingdom

              #7
              Originally posted by Fourrings
              lucky it didn't come through the screen that would have been nasty.
              Aye, he wouldn't have screamed like a girl then

              Mark

              Race Clio RS197

              S2 Coupe ABY (Green) - RIP
              S2 Coupe ABY (Blue) - Sold

              Comment

              • S2central.net
                Retired OG Mod
                • Jul 2003
                • 16590
                • Country: Northern Ireland

                #8
                JHC - is that photo for real ? All of a sudden my lunch wants to come up - just thinking about that !!!!!


                Paul
                Paul Nugent
                Webmaster http://S2central.net
                Administrator http://S2forum.com

                1994 S2 Coupe ABY - aka Project Lazarus
                2001 A6 allroad 2.5TDi - family tank
                2003 S4 Avant 4.2 V8 - daily burble

                Purveyor of HomeFries and Exclusive agent for Samco hose kits (S2/RS2)

                There are only 10 kinds of people that understand binary - those that do, and those that don't

                Comment

                • ubernugen.com
                  S2Forum Hobbyist
                  • Nov 2005
                  • 12
                  • Home: Scotland Current: United States

                  #9
                  Same thing happened to me in Idaho picking up my mate's new B4. I was driving and narrowly escaped an entire family of elk (deer as big as horses) on a twisty river side road with new asphalt and no cops and, ahem, everything that entails... Later on after dark, I was driving 5mph BELOW the limit because I was paranoid about deer in the road. Rick opined how the odds were slim that we'd see another thing in the road and I replied that it was the height of the rut... which means that the critters are positively out of their gourds with sex hormones. Sure enough, a head popped up in the bushes up ahead and I jabbed the brakes, did a little jink about as far as I could go without putting a wheel off the the damn animal lauched itself straight toward the car, butting it's head on the A-pillar.

                  Dead: Winshield, mirror, wing, deer.
                  4.2 ABZ V8 1993 B4 Quattro
                  http://www.ubernugen.com

                  Comment

                  • shadquattro
                    S2Forum Addict
                    • Aug 2003
                    • 263
                    • Home: England Current: Scotland

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Fourrings
                    Try getting hit in the chest by a pheasant at 40 mph on a motorbike, and then put up with getting the mik taken out of you at work for the next month due to not being able to move cos of the pain of 5 broken ribs
                    Not to mention the paramedic taking the mik out of the feathers stuck in my lid.
                    Pheasant didn't survive

                    I echo wh,at the lads say, least it was the cq20v at the time, and you're lucky it didn't come through the screen that would have been nasty.
                    k a c


                    Out and about last week a fella on a bike went into a cow on the road, the cow was dead and the bikey guy was covered in cow sh*t , bike was a right off and he has 3 broken ribs and both legs are broken, I cleaned him up best i could but omg did he stink
                    skint but fast

                    Comment

                    • Stick Insect
                      S2Forum Fiend
                      • Dec 2003
                      • 2338
                      • Country: United Kingdom

                      #11
                      Originally posted by rotoryboy
                      Aye, he wouldn't have screamed like a girl then

                      Left Hand drive car rotaryboy...

                      Not nice to think what would happen to the passenger!

                      Girlfriend had two deer collisions in one month.

                      She's a vegetarian
                      David

                      Comment

                      • volcano rs
                        S2Forum Fiend
                        • Jun 2005
                        • 2265
                        • Country: United Kingdom

                        #12
                        he just wanted a ride

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