Sunday joke!!

**pastures16** · 12 February 2006, 19:34

lmfao no pun intended

**HPmuirt** · 12 February 2006, 20:52

Sounds like the old Macc Lads song, called 'Got To Be Gordon's (Takeaway)'...goes summut like....

Poof at the clinic - he's got the gay plague
Help me doctor, my bum's in pain.
Get down Kwok Lai's for a 45, eight tandooris and a chicken pie
Ten pints of Guinness and a vindaloo, box of All Bran and a bowl of prunes
Dash to the bog and lock the door
Then you'll know what your ****h0le's for

Don't be a poof or a queer brown hatter
A turd burglar or a buttock basher
Eat chips n gravy and cod in batter
You'll be safe from the botty slappers

Don't be a poof or a queer brown hatter
A turd burglar or a queer **** stabber
A tunnel tester or a f@cking gay
and eat at Gordon's Takeaway

Quality lyrics

Cheers n

Si

**vonbeck** · 12 February 2006, 21:17

brill

**Coxy** · 13 February 2006, 11:22

Here's some more!!

An english,irish and gay cockrel on a farm

6AM
The english cockrel goes "**** a doodle doo"

The Irish Cockrel goes "doodle doodle ****"

and the gay cockrel goes "any ****'ll doo"
----------------
Guy walks into a chemists and asks for a bottle of cyanide.

The pharmacist, trying to keep a professional posture, asked what he wanted it for.

The man says "I want to kill my wife."

"I'm sorry, Sir," the pharmacist replied, "but you will have to understand that under such circumstances I can't sell you any cyanide."

The guy reaches into his wallet and produces a photo of his wife.

The pharmacist takes a look at the photo and replies, "I'm very sorry, Sir. I didn't realize you had a prescription."
------------------------
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, threw in a penny and made a wish.

The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled and said...

"Cool!...It really works"!

**merlin's S4** · 13 February 2006, 17:35

Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were
swimming around in the sea - one called Justin and the other called Christian.
The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that
inhabited the area.

Finally one day Justin said to Christian, "I'm fed up with being a prawn
- I wish I was a shark, then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten."
A large mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted",
and lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark. Horrified, Christian
immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time passed (as it invariably does) and Justin found life as a shark
boring and lonely. All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realize that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he
thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn. He
approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he

found himself turned back into a prawn. With tears of joy in his tiny
little eyes Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail.

Looking around the gathering at the reef he realized he couldn't see his
old pal. "Where's Christian?" he asked. "He's at home, still distraught that his best friend changed sides to the enemy and became a shark", came the reply.

Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he
set off to Christian's abode. As he opened the coral gate memories came
flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "It's me, Justin, your
old friend, come out and see me again." Christian replied, "No way man,
you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy, and I'll not be tricked into
being your dinner."

Justin cried back "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed"...

"I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again, Christian".

Sunday joke!!

Sunday joke!!

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