Proud to be British ? Think again...

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  • MidnightBlueS2
    S2Forum Extremist
    • Jul 2005
    • 1653
    • Home: United States Current: Belgium

    #1

    Proud to be British ? Think again...

    Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a

    > Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a

    > Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch

    > American shows on a Japanese TV. And the most British thing of all?

    >

    > Suspicion of anything foreign.

    >

    > Oh and......

    NOT TO MENTION.

    >

    > 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

    >

    > 142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new

    shirts.

    >

    > 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of

    > screwdrivers.

    >

    > 31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while

    > the fairy lights were plugged in.

    >

    > 19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas

    > decorations were chocolate.

    >

    > British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker

    > pulling accidents

    >

    > 101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out



    > of the soles of their feet.

    >

    > 18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit

    > cigarette in their mouth.

    >

    > A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after

    > opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

    >

    > 5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of Control

    > Scalextric cars.

    >

    > And finally.........

    >

    > In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the

    > toilet.
    Midnight Blue S2 - SOLD - 1993 S2 Avant
  • WabTheKing
    S2Forum Fiend
    • May 2004
    • 2567
    • Country: United Kingdom

    #2

    Comment

    • Audi Parts Guru
      S2Forum Extremist
      • Jul 2003
      • 1317
      • Home: England Current: United Kingdom

      #3
      Originally posted by MidnightBlueS2
      Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer
      I'd agree with the German car thing. Wouldn't agree with the Irish pub or Belgium beer thing though

      Originally posted by MidnightBlueS2
      then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way
      Don't forget the "Chippy" now that's 100% British

      Originally posted by MidnightBlueS2
      to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
      The only thing I'd agree with in that statement is the Japanese TV bit

      As for the rest of it, well we're no different to any other country in the Western world
      S2 Avant......fully loaded :rock: :bow: Slipper Wagons Rule !!!!!

      Comment

      • PeteRR
        S2Forum Extremist
        • Jun 2004
        • 1326
        • Country: United Kingdom

        #4
        Am I the only person in Britain never to have had a Greek Kebab?

        Just 'cos they look so damn rank!

        Good one, though I do (sometimes) drive a British car, drink British Ale, sit on British furniture......

        Comment

        • Bowlerwell
          S2Forum Extremist
          • Sep 2005
          • 1052
          • Country: Scotland

          #5
          Do you not have a sledging statistic?

          A family friend of ours was out sledging with his daughter, hit a bump and landed on his head. A&E told them they had already had a fatality that week from a father sledging!!...
          John Bowlerwell
          Electronic Engineer

          Present:
          Nogaro Blue RS2 - TOE
          Previous:
          Kingfisher Blue S2 - UAA
          Volcano Black RS2 LHD - DEX

          Comment

          • S4-Sleden
            S2Forum Addict
            • Dec 2005
            • 220
            • Country: Norway

            #6
            Glad im Norwegian then
            2003 VW Passat Highline 130 TDI wagon with ALL options.

            Comment

            • Ski
              S2Forum Fiend
              • Jan 2004
              • 2591
              • Home: Poland Current: United Kingdom

              #7
              Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

              Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

              Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.

              Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

              Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and put our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

              Only in Britain... do we buy hot dogs in packs of ten and buns in packs of eight.

              Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

              Only in Britain... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
              ABY Coupe
              sigpic

              Comment

              • MidnightBlueS2
                S2Forum Extremist
                • Jul 2005
                • 1653
                • Home: United States Current: Belgium

                #8
                No, no ! That would be the USA ! ;-)
                Midnight Blue S2 - SOLD - 1993 S2 Avant

                Comment

                • curlyks2
                  S2Forum Extremist
                  • Feb 2004
                  • 1069
                  • Country: United Kingdom

                  #9
                  Originally posted by Ski
                  Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
                  Not at my local bank: two doors, one after the other, in an airlock arrangement. Only one (controlled by electronic catches) can be open at one time. No possibility of running for it - with or without the pen (complete with chain attached) - since you have to wait for the inner door to close behind you before being able to open the outer one.

                  Originally posted by Ski
                  Only in Britain... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.


                  Ck.
                  Shocked, exhausted, hosed, bushed, dumped, chipped, mounted, filtered, gauged, packed, intermittantly wiped and braked. I mean broken. Now, about the car...

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