It was a rather pleasent day in the little down of Abbeymead, Gloucester when Laura rose from her bed and opened the pale curtains of her window. She blinked into the light and watched the sweet children walking nicely to school.....
....nah, I never wake up early enough to see any kids going to school! Who am I kidding?
Okay, so here's what REALLY happened.
After playing a few hours of GTA4 on the PS3, Laura got round to cleaning the kitchen and dusting Ross' beloved Hifi and speakers. Then she got ready to get into the shower and was about to step inside when she screamed a terrible scream that could be heard from miles around. Even the dogs yelped at the sound. - hey that rhymes!!
Standing shakily, right leg raised high, Laura was about to step on a GIANT eight legged SPIDER.
I'm SERIOUS, this thing was HUGEEEE!!!
Not caring what the neighbours would think, Laura leaped out of the bathroom naked, ran across the hall to the lounge and fumbled to get her phone.
"ROSS!!! THERE'S A HUGE SPIDER IN THE BATHROOM AND I WANTED TO HAVE A SHOWER AND I'M REALLY SCARED!" Laura sobbed on the phone.
"Calm down" Ross replied. "listen, is there anything you can catch it with?....."
-silence- Laura spied the argos book that she had used to kill a spider the night before...
"wait, of course you're not going to catch it" Ross said suddenly, knowing of Laura's dramatic fear of even being in the same room as a spider.
"Can you spray it with hairspray?" - he asked. Laura opened her mouth in horror at the idea of wasting her hair spray.
"I have bleach!" she exclaimed.
"Good," Ross said, "Get it with the bleach and hose it down with the shower head".
After a few mintutes of coaxing, Laura shakily held Ross' aftershave and sprayed it at arms length towards the spider that seemed to give her a naughty giggle as if it knew Laura was terrified.
It took a few seconds for the spray to reach the spider, and when it did, it began to scurry about the bath tub and it legs got stuck to the bottom. Laura picked up the bleach and poured it onto the little beast and screetched when it began to use it's legs to swim towards her!
Laura imagined a croaky, evil voice saying "Even if it kills me...I will get you!"
Laura whimpered as she reached for the shower head, turned on the water and sprayed it towards the spider to blast it down the drain. The Spider clutched at the plug and tried to stay up but it was too much and before disappearing inside the drain, Laura could hear its little creepy cry of "I will be avenged!!!"
Laura ran forwards and shut the drain so no more spiders could crawl out.
Now Laura knows it will only be a matter of time before the next spidy assasin will turn up......
But as for now, she rejoices in the knowledge that she conquered the battle with the Spider in the bath!!
....nah, I never wake up early enough to see any kids going to school! Who am I kidding?
Okay, so here's what REALLY happened.
After playing a few hours of GTA4 on the PS3, Laura got round to cleaning the kitchen and dusting Ross' beloved Hifi and speakers. Then she got ready to get into the shower and was about to step inside when she screamed a terrible scream that could be heard from miles around. Even the dogs yelped at the sound. - hey that rhymes!!
Standing shakily, right leg raised high, Laura was about to step on a GIANT eight legged SPIDER.
I'm SERIOUS, this thing was HUGEEEE!!!
Not caring what the neighbours would think, Laura leaped out of the bathroom naked, ran across the hall to the lounge and fumbled to get her phone.
"ROSS!!! THERE'S A HUGE SPIDER IN THE BATHROOM AND I WANTED TO HAVE A SHOWER AND I'M REALLY SCARED!" Laura sobbed on the phone.
"Calm down" Ross replied. "listen, is there anything you can catch it with?....."
-silence- Laura spied the argos book that she had used to kill a spider the night before...
"wait, of course you're not going to catch it" Ross said suddenly, knowing of Laura's dramatic fear of even being in the same room as a spider.
"Can you spray it with hairspray?" - he asked. Laura opened her mouth in horror at the idea of wasting her hair spray.
"I have bleach!" she exclaimed.
"Good," Ross said, "Get it with the bleach and hose it down with the shower head".
After a few mintutes of coaxing, Laura shakily held Ross' aftershave and sprayed it at arms length towards the spider that seemed to give her a naughty giggle as if it knew Laura was terrified.
It took a few seconds for the spray to reach the spider, and when it did, it began to scurry about the bath tub and it legs got stuck to the bottom. Laura picked up the bleach and poured it onto the little beast and screetched when it began to use it's legs to swim towards her!
Laura imagined a croaky, evil voice saying "Even if it kills me...I will get you!"
Laura whimpered as she reached for the shower head, turned on the water and sprayed it towards the spider to blast it down the drain. The Spider clutched at the plug and tried to stay up but it was too much and before disappearing inside the drain, Laura could hear its little creepy cry of "I will be avenged!!!"
Laura ran forwards and shut the drain so no more spiders could crawl out.
Now Laura knows it will only be a matter of time before the next spidy assasin will turn up......
But as for now, she rejoices in the knowledge that she conquered the battle with the Spider in the bath!!
If you just put your hand flat on the bath next to the spid, it's easy enough to coax it to scuttle onto your hand. Then it's just a case of walking down to the front door and flicking the little fella outside...
best get that in quickly mate 
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